


Once, but Never Again

by binaryStars



Series: Humanstuck SolKri [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: It also needs more SolKri, M/M, This website needs some SolKri that isn't porn, so here we go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-03-23
Packaged: 2018-05-28 14:24:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6332629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/binaryStars/pseuds/binaryStars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"In Which Sollux Captor has No Goddamn Idea How to Cut Hair, and his Poor Boyfriend is the Recipient of his Lack of Talent in this Field"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once, but Never Again

"The only reason I'm allowing you scissors near my neck is because our financial security is low and we can't afford to-"  


"I know, and I've got this."  


"No, but I'm not finished-"  


"You're just worried I'm going to mess up. Have a little faith, KK."  


"We've talked about nicknames, remember? How I have a _real name_ and how you should _use it_ when referring to me. Plus, you also call _Karkat_ this, and if anything, I believe that you're original enough to come up with your own nickname for me, if anything, which I still wouldn't like. May I remind you that disregarding my wishes-"  


"I fucked up."  


"Excuse me?"  


"I fucked up."  


Kankri leaned his head forward into his hands. He shouldn't have agreed to this, and he should've bothered Porrim about it. Porrim would know what to do; how to cut hair. Now, he couldn't even do that-- she'd no doubt laugh at whatever his boyfriend had done, and laugh at _him_ for letting him cut his hair. Not that he would've been offended by it, but just the thought that the teasing would _never cease_. You'd think he was joking, but he remembered the _one time_ he accidentally put his absolutely symmetrical turtleneck sweater on backwards only because he was _still_ being pestered about it.  


"What did you do?" he asked quietly. He didn't reply. "If it's something that Porrim will ridicule, you had better own up _right now_ , and allow me to return the favour."  


"No, no," he said, the look on his face turning to a grimace. "Well, okay, maybe, but she'd ridicule anything not done by her."  


Kankri's mouth flattened to a line. He knew that his boyfriend was right, but _still_. He felt fingers ruffle his hair, and pull and push it back and forth.  


"I'll get Kanaya to look at it," he assured Kankri. "She'll be alright with it, and she likes to meddle."  


He kissed his cheek, and Kankri rubbed it off, almost in a pout.  


"Sollux, this isn't the time for that," he told him. "Small displays of affection, although welcomed, are entirely inappropriate in the current situation, and quite frankly, I think you should just call Kanaya, already, and get this experience over with, as this is an inconvenience both for me, and for, eventually, you."  


"What, are you not going to fuck me tonight?" he joked, with a snicker. It was funny because Kankri still clung to his vows of celibacy, and so they never did that, anyways.  


"You know better than to make that kind of joke," he sighed, rolling his eyes, and swiveling on his stool, "and you know that it doesn't even matter, because I always find a way to get you back." Sollux laughed again. He was always so damn cheerful when fake-threatened, and sometimes he hated that. No, no, he didn't. He could hardly pretend. "Go get in contact with Kanaya."  


"Whatever you say," he told him with a small wink.  


Sollux went over to his, er, _their_ , computer. The mistake was easy to make-- Sollux never let Kankri touch the computer; he had no idea how to use it. Plus, he was afraid of what would happen to maybe their one quality object, considering that Kankri went through three phones in a month, at best, and wasn't allowed to have anything but a flip phone (which he got more frustrated with, but were harder to break). He messaged Kanaya something quickly, and didn't wait for a reply before turning around, to find his boyfriend missing.  


"KK, where'd you go?" he called into their apartment.  


"I went to inspect the damage," he explained, stepping out of the bathroom.  


His hair honestly didn't look that bad from the front. It was obviously shorter on one side, and maybe it looked a little choppy, but only if you were looking for it. Sollux almost told him this, and then he turned around, and he almost started laughing. Yep, it was a mess. Three little cuts, and he'd royally fucked up his boyfriend's hair.  


"Don't laugh," he sighed. "It's your fault I look absolutely ridiculous, and frankly, I think that you laughing at your mistakes keep you from learning from them."  


"Well, lesson learned," he told him, leaning back in his chair, "Do Not Cut Your Boyfriend's Hair."  


"At least you got something out of this situation," he muttered, walking closer to him. He leaned against the kitchen counter. "And not horrendous hair that all of your friends will ridicule you for."  


"Don't worry," Sollux reassured him, "none of your friends care about your hair, and neither do I."  


There was a small _ding_ behind them, as Kanaya messaged him back. Sollux swirled around in his special chair, that not even Kankri was allowed to use, to answer.  


_GA: What Kind Of Hair Emergency_   


TA: ii fucked up.  
GA: Say No More  
GA: I'm On My Way  
TA: don't tell Porriim.  


Sollux turned around when Kanaya left.  


"She's coming over," he told Kankri, over his shoulder.  


"I know," he answered, hovering right next to him. Sollux jumped a little. "I hope you don't mind if I take a seat on your, ah, Chair of Wonders, because I am about to sit down, and I would like to assure that you are comfortable with that before I do so."  


"Have fun," Sollux nodded. Kankri would go from joking to serious regularly, and Sollux had _finally_ found the pattern. He could relate to those switches; bipolar is a bitch to deal with.  


Kankri sat down on Sollux's lap, and slowly leaned into him. He wasn't keen on being touched, no matter how close he was with the other, and it took a moment to be adjusted. He bit the inside of his lip as he tried to get comfortable. There was a small moment of silence.  


"You good?" Sollux asked, and he nodded. Although there was very little he wouldn't answer verbally, this was something he couldn't quite bring himself to say aloud yet. In fact, just being touched by Sollux sent his brain into an internal state of screaming. Sollux wrapped one of his arms around his waist, and gave him a small grin. "I know, I know, I spilled my pills and didn't take them. But, as it so happens, I'm fine today. A little manic, I think, but I'm fine."  


"We have to go into town today," he muttered in reply. "I didn't want to have to do that..."  


"If Kanaya can't fix your hair, do you still want to?" Sollux mused.  


"No, not especially," he answered, "but I will, anyways, if only to assure that you actually make your way to the pharmacy, and not get sidetracked by, oh, I don't know... Four movies, or something." Sollux snickered, which somehow always brought a smile to Kankri's face. He expertly covered it up by loudly continuing with, "It's impractical for a pharmacy to be located so closely to a cinema theater, especially considering that some of their customers, other than you, require the same medication, for the same reason."  


"I get that you feel strongly about this situation," Sollux told him, "or, _feel_ this situation, but really? Every time we walk to the pharmacy, we actually _do_ stop for a movie. That's fun, or more fun than you pretend you aren't."  


"It's your idea," he protested. "Always."  


"Listen," he said, turning Kankri's face to his, two fingers underneath his chin. "I fucking love popcorn, and movie theater popcorn is the best." Kankri opened his mouth to say something, but Sollux wasn't finished, and closed his mouth by pushing up his lower jaw. "Keep in mind that I spent three years of my life with braces on, and couldn't eat popcorn during that span of time."  


"You ate popcorn, anyways," he reminded him, pulling his hand away, "and that was six years ago, and even then, that was when we first met."  


"Wow, really?" Sollux asked, the smile creeping wider across his face. "And we started going out a year later." Kankri smiled back. "And, here we are. We should do something. Make something up for me; you're good at that."  


"Am I?" he asked, surprised. "You never mention it."  


"I didn't think I needed to," he shrugged. "Do you want me to?"  


"I think it would be preferable, yes, if you told me that my efforts were appreciated."  


"Well, your efforts are appreciated."  


"I also think that you are going to need to prove this to me, because otherwise how will I know whether or not you are lying to me? Not that I'm accusing you of lying to me, as you've never done that before, but you do have a tendency to hide the truth."  


"Well, I think I kno-" The doorbell rang. "Fuck dammit."  


Kankri stood up hastily to go get the door, and let Kanaya in, wiping the smallest, near-invisible hints of red embarrassment out of his face. That had not just happened. At least she had the decency to knock, and not just walk in, like maybe any other friend of Sollux's would. Alright, maybe Tavros wouldn't. Feferi probably also wouldn't, but she was almost as welcome as Aradia or Terezi, who had both gotten explicit permission from both himself and Sollux to be able to walk in at any given moment, provided they gave prior indication of their arrival (Terezi was surprisingly good at upholding this rule).  


Kankri's hair was fixable, but it took a long time. Kanaya wondered aloud several times about how Sollux was able to mess up so badly with three snips, but otherwise fixed it without a word. She'd brought her entire kit over with her, for some reason, and pushed her fingers through it when she was finished. It was almost too short to do that with, and way shorter than what either of them were comfortable with, but they could cope.  


She left after a little while, after asking questions about their personal lives and their romance and whatnot, but the couple redirected the conversation to something far less private, in order to get her out of their home more quickly. Kanaya, not being an idiot, realized this, and left.  


The pair spent most of the rest of the day on the couch, watching dumb soap operas that Karkat had taped for them. They really enjoyed making fun of Karkat and his interests passive-aggressively, which was no doubt what had attracted them to one another in the first place.

(In case you were wondering, they headed out at around four thirty to go get some new lithium orotate for Sollux, and then went to dinner, and then finished with a movie. They never did a lot of romantic stuff in public, so it was mainly subtle flirting and lots of awkward staring, and thoughts trailing off into nothing, but they honestly couldn't ask for anything better.)


End file.
